Tag Archives: spiritual

My every breath

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My every breath…..

feels claustrophobic

is a struggle

is like an elephant sitting on my chest

is lost in solitary confinement

is like breathing solely through a straw

is like running a perpetual marathon

is strangled by my absent functioning muscle

is like breathing in and out through a balloon

is stolen by windy days

is consciously controlled tirelessly

is my minds sole focus– in, out, in, out……

is my conscious intention…second by second, minute by minute

leaves no fog on windows…no message left

scares me! is it my last?

 

is savoured

is survival

is an essence of life

is a blessing

shares my story/journey

tells you to live in the moment…each breath

tells you not to take it for granted

is my expression of who I am

affirms I am still supposed to be here

 

Njari

15 May 2016

 

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To grieve and celebrate

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I grieve and celebrate I grieve the soulful woman who once stood and walked tall, graceful and strong And now celebrate the soulful eyes that sees what was never seen before I grieve the loss of those afraid to journey with me when I was well And celebrate now with those not afraid to share my difficult path I grieve for those who strive for material things and ego fantasies And celebrate those who strive for good character and a soulful heart I grieve for all the adventures that took me round this incredible earth And now celebrate the shining sun, blue sky and butterflies in my yard I grieve the freedom I felt to be totally spontaneous and gypsy like And now celebrate the sacredness and presence of every moment I grieve and celebrate

Njari

04.12.14

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Dark Energies & Light Imposters – Healing with Awareness

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Dark Light Neutral

This is the conversation that needs to be had with those on the spiritual path, in particular lightworkers and healers. This topic has been in my awareness for a long time, and as a soul of the light, I have also felt between the shadows. The prodding lately has necessitated the sharing of information that some may balk at, particularly those who refuse to see what lay behind the smoke screen or veils of our respective ‘reality’. But information is constantly urging me to share.

We are cosmic explorers, and it is a vision of spiritual life, that focuses on how we live on this planet as spiritual beings, on the process by which we incarnate and become fully alive and ourselves in our daily lives, and on how we gradually transform our ordinary living and the life of the planet so that all beings can thrive within this sacred cosmos. With that comes energy, entities and influences out of the scope of our human capabilities…though those with extra-ordinary abilities can see and interact beyond this, some with control, some without.

Duality (good vs bad, yin vs yang, etc.) serves a great purpose, since it helps us (spiritual beings having a human being experience) to know through experience what it’s like to be us, a part of God, Goddess, Source, Divine Spirit/All That Is. And through our experience, as we mature spiritually, we aim to inhabit the realms of light more and more, or we are filled with light, or light drives out, or overcomes, darkness. Light is associated with pleasant spiritual experience and we seek the light as relief from the darkness of our human condition.

If you are working in or with the spiritual it is important to recognise the different kinds of darkness as well as light that exist along your path. Much is known about beings of the light, but beings of the dark are something some tend to avoid acknowledging. It’s so important to understand you can be a channel for both, although are you skilled enough to know what you are channelling?

What I share is intended to stimulate thought, reflection and dialogue with yourself and others. From my own point of view, I’m not religious, however I am spiritual so my terminology may vary (i.e I use Source, instead of God). My path is my own, as is yours, and we all have our own experiences, knowledge and interpretations, and I like to share what resonates with me based on that.

Let me introduce you to Audwin Trapman, who is a Love Energy Healer, Angel Healer, Light Worker, and Educator from Toronto. Audwin has experienced Dark Beings and Entities and has also heard from many others with similar experiences over the years. Having gone through a period of tremendous healing himself, he is now 100% devoted to helping others heal with the force of Love and Light.

It was no coincidence I found Audwin. His articles on his website resonated with a sense of my inner knowings, and expressed in words what I was thinking.  I would like to share with you some of his thoughts:

Our Beginning on Earth

“This is a journey we all have to take. No one starts off on Earth 100% in alignment with the Light. The default position therefore is that we all start off forgetting that we are Beings of Light and on a Soul level work with Darkness as it is our only other choice.

We all have registered abandonment and betrayal issues against God, His Angels, and the Higher Beings that work with the Light. Until these issues are healed we all resist the Light with our full Soul power and survival instincts. Again all that is left to us is the Dark. It is a slow and arduous journey for most of us to return to the Light. This takes many lifetimes.

We bring forward the issues and challenges of previous lifetimes with us as we reincarnate. We also bring forward the degree of Light and Dark that we had stopped at in our last lifetime. As we progress through our lifetimes we ultimately become lighter and lighter until we finally reawaken to the truth that we are Beings of Love and Light.

As we experience this journey we must consciously separate/free ourselves from the Darkness.”

The Truth About The Dark

 “I am having this conversation with more and more people so it became clear to me that it is time to write how the Dark also heals people and how they can impersonate the Light.

 It is a dangerous assumption to believe that just because healing is going on it must be the Light that is doing it. Actually that is a false belief.

 The truth is that the Dark are more than happy to provide healing to people, often quite dramatically, but with the unstated goal of then hooking into the Soul’s and life paths of those fine healers unknowingly working with them and the people receiving healing.

 This is the dynamic that is presently going on, on planet Earth: the Lightworkers working to free the Earth and its people of Darkness, and the Darkness simultaneously working to entrap those Lightworkers and the people asking for healing. Both the Light and the Dark know that it is a mass consciousness shift. The Light is totally and unequivocally shifting the consciousness of the Planet to the Light and the Dark is resisting it. Once a certain consciousness level is reached then the Earth and all its life will shift to a higher dimension or Ascension.

 Using healing as an enticement the Dark has been forming a spiderweb of hijacked Souls that are its means of trying to stop the Light.

 Most people have no idea that their Soul has been bound by invisible agreements with the Darkness. They just continue on with their lives thinking all is well and good. Until of course they try to remove the Darkness, and then the Darkness makes itself known.

 Here are some common Dark Beings that do healing (with Dark contracts attached) and even impersonate the Light: Dark Angels, Angel impersonators: elohim (not Elohim with the capital E), Annunaki Aliens. (Also will impersonate Angels), Reptilian Aliens, Grey Aliens, Over 10 other Alien species.

Humans that have passed on, and retain their identity from Earth. True Ascended Masters are few and far between and are acknowledged as such by other Light Beings and the Archangels.

 Ancestors. If your ancestors are still hanging around then they are stuck and have not returned to the Light yet.

 The Dark is often able to do profound healing’s and here’s why:

They don’t respect our free will to ask or choose and will do whatever they want to us, anytime they want. The Light would never do anything that was not asked for or in line with our highest growth and learning.

 The energies they use are Dark but still can be used for healing and transformations.

 They bind you with multiple Dark contracts in return for the healings they provide to you so they are very motivated to do this exchange.

 They know that you will in turn spread the contracts on to others if you are a healer and do healings for others. This includes passing on healing abilities to other healers as these Dark Beings in turn start to work with them. (To work with the Light the journey is one of healing our separation from God issues, the Light never just hands us or passes on healing abilities).

If you don’t know who you are working with and are just doing healing then by default it is the Darkness that you are working with. 

To work with the Light you must be very specific to ask for only Light Beings who are in alignment and ONE with God’s White Light. For example… Angel’s and Archangels of Light and Love.”

If you are interested in reading more about light and darkness and healing, please visit Audwin Trapman’s website and you can also booking a healing session.

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Words from myself – as an 18 year old to the World

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I wrote this when I was 18 years of age (19 years ago now) in my journal and this is the first time I have shared it with anyone:

 

My Message to all as a concerned intuitive young woman. I am too well aware the imperfections of our world, it is surely a rollercoaster. For I feel and see the pain people go through in life. Life is pain, but it is through pain and traumas that strength is found. Each of us is special and we each hold the gift of a unique treasure. To understand life and people and all that surrounds us in the now, you must first understand yourself. There is so much to reflect on within and around, yet sometimes we feel so lost. I want people to know they are Beautiful and that we are blessed with the greatest artistic tool/skill, our own individual minds! Our minds really do create the picture of our lives, and all we really need to do is Stop, and Listen. Realise that everything has a door, and that all we have to do is open one door to allow more doors to open. Sometimes opening doors can be quite a task, for the first door is to our SELF. If we could all just open that door, to be who we really are, you will unlock and reach many many dreams, dimensions, and potentials. The more doors you open the better life will be, and just Be. I believe in all. The key to following lifes path, whatever it may be, is to learn Trust, Truth, Love, Belief and Acceptance of your Self. Never be afraid of your deepest heart felt dreams – have Courage to do what you feel within. It is a feeling without judgement. We are all free and hold great potential. I give all peace and love today.

The Horse & The Raven

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Our hearts and names
are embedded on
a strong forest tree
amidst a town
on indian lands
I grew to love
I knew I’d be

Spirit led us together
this wild free horse
full of light and shadow
and a raven caught
between the darkness
and fire light
dancing a two year
strong dream

There is a deep longing
within every soul
to return to its true home
from whence it came
I saw you and I knew
I had visions too
I still see the way

I love you
as I have never loved another
or ever will again
I love you with all I am
and all i hope to be
forever I will be here
should you fly back to me

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Catching Me When I Fall

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A beautiful keepsake poem from my mum to me. Any parent feels pain when their child is ill or going through something tough on this planet.

 

THIS IS A POEM FOR YOU

SEPT 27 TH 1976 AN ANGEL WAS BORN,SHE NEARLY NEVER MADE IT MY HEART WAS TORN, BUT YOU MADE IT TO ME

LIFE ITSELF TOOK OVER AND GAVE ME A LITTLE BUNDLE WRIGGLING AND CRYING.

 
AN ANGEL SHE WOULD BE.
 
THROUGH HER YEARS HER GRACE AND POISE AND HER INSPIRING MIND GREW
 
I THOUGHT SHE (IS AN AN ANGEL) IT IS SO TRUE.
 

SO DIFFERENT FROM OTHER GIRLS DECENT AND KIND AND GIVING.

 

THANK YOU GOD FOR THIS GIFT.

 

THIS ANGEL GREW UP FAST BUT SO MUCH LIKE HER NANNA WHO HAD PASSED.

 

IT WAS EERILY DELIGHTFUL TO SEEMY MUM IN HER LOVING SOUL AND BEING ALL SHE IS NOW

 

AS I AM WRITING I FEEL SO HELPLESS , I WANT TO HEAL HER GOD ! BUT HOW ?

 

I PRAY AS A TRUE MUM DOES FOR HER CHILD.

 

MANY HEALTHY HAPPY YEARS WENT BY FOR YOU ANGEL THEN ILLNESS STRUCK.(GOD) YOU MADE ME WILD LORD, WHY , WHY, WHY,

I WANTED TO SWAP PLACES GIVE HER MY YEARS, BUT ALL I CAME UP WITH WERE MANY TEARS,

 

SO, ANGEL GIRL WE WILL GO ALONG THIS JOURNEY TOGETHER , FOR I AM HERE

 

FOR HOWEVER LONG IT TAKES OR HOWEVER LONG YOU WANT ME TO.

 

ALL I ASK OF THE (GOD) I PRAY TO ….

 

YOU HAVE AN ANGEL WHO IS MEANT TO BE DOWN HERE, LIKE THIS.

 

WHATEVER REASON ILLNESS STRUCK.

 

IT WAS A SHOCK TO US ALL.

 

BUT, ANGEL GIRL YOU HOLD YOUR HEAD HIGH AND TALL.

 

THE STRENGTH YOU HAVE TO COPE IS MASSIVE.

 

ANGEL GIRL YOU ARE LOVED BY ALL,

 

I AM HERE TO CATCH YOU WHEN YOU FALL….

 

YOU ARE AN ANGEL AMONGST US ALL FOR A LONG TIME TO COME .YOU WILL STILL BE HERE .

Endangered

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they are just words, so you may think
but one day I will be gone, as you know me here
sometimes I feel like an endangered species
misunderstood, sought out curiously
contained and rarely seen
but sending out messages
and feeling energy
profoundly
and viewing everything around me
from my confines
tears flow easily
because you underestimate
the depth of my heart
I am here to Love
that’s all….

Eight – the number of infinity

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So I want to share a lucid dream I had in January with you all.

I was just having an afternoon nap,  and was dreaming of myself, where I was napping with the cat; where we both were.  I got up and although tired I was walking to the kitchen but I couldn’t really see (maybe due to tiredness and blood pressure -that happens at times to me). My  mum walked past and exclaimed “I have this wave of optimism come over me, I feel really good for some reason”. (my dad was also in the dream-even though my parents are not together).

I go back to my room as it is, where I had been napping (for real and in the dream). I pick up my mobile phone, then BAM…a silver orb,  like a full moon appears on my phone screen, spinning,  and the word sun? trying to manifest on the screen (the letters were fluttering around) and then the number 8! In that moment, I feel an incredible power that takes my breath away and I’m telling myself… “ok ,I am ready to see more things and they are showing it to me!”.

I woke up kind of surprised! I vaguely recall seeing my phone randomly showing some star map chart too.

A day later, I was randomly browsing some photos on my iPad, and then i see what I never noticed before….

I looked at my cloud pictures, a series where one also features an alien face (a Grey) and owl (ET’s you project/screen themselves as that to people) and then I noticed the number 8 which appeared later, and almost looks like words! So I found that beyond coincidence.

check out these pics

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I know that the number 8 in numerology is about power.

“NUMBER 8
Resolves dualities, expansion, dissolution, dimension of the timeless, good and bad, right and wrong, day and night, ability to see and relate to eternal dimensions, balance between forces, connects spirit and matter, developing confidence to follow a vision, breaks down barriers to transformation, reality, courage.”

I also see  it as yin yang, and if you turn it around on the side it is the infinity symbol and timelessness; a perpetual hourglass moving from one dimension to the other…like being in both dimensions (real and lucid), like my dream.

Later that week, I sat at a table for dinner with my friend, and we were ushered to table 8!

More on the Numerology of Number 8

Whilst 8, more than any other number, puts the emphasis in the areas of career, business, finances and authority, the shape of the number reflects its most important attribute, balance. When the 8 comes knocking, you can be assured that you will reap what you’ve sown.

The 8 balances the material and immaterial worlds. At its best, it is as spiritual as it is materialistic. The spiritual side of the 8 is practical, realistic and intelligent. It knows the difference between make-believe and genuine spiritual realizations. On the material plane, it is focused on results, often in the form of money, yet does not care much about money for the sake of money. It is not greedy, it sees money as a tool, not an end-result. It is generous and willing to take risks.

5 Minute Mood Makeover

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Yes, we all have our moments of despondency, apathy, and just feeling down.  I think happiness is not determined  by how much pain we are dealt but how we recover from or respond to it. It’s not easy! but there are some activities that take 5 minutes or less, which are sure to elevate your mood…and I want to remind others that the smallest things or simple things in life can bring great joy.

Daydream. This is one of my favourite past times! and recently shown to help us think more creatively. So, think of your favorite film or television scene/show or characters, places and experiences you have had travelling, or goals that you are working towards- the ones that always make you feel really good.

Sunshine Bath. Go outside and sit on a chair, a lounger, or near a bright window and reap the benefits of the warm light.  Sunlight ups our  vitamin D, which in turn keeps serotonin (a feel-good hormone) high.
Stretch and touch your toes. According to Dr Oz “It opens up your hip joints, which is where most people store tension,” Hold the position for a minute, before slowly rolling up. As you lift, so will your mood.

Smell the Roses.  Appreciate the small wonders of life, that inspire joy. Looking up at the stars in the sky, butterflies and birds in your garden, the cuddle from your pet/s, a cup of tea whilst reading, the full moon, the first rays of dawn, a cherished card/letter.
Give to Another. How good have you felt when you have given something to another person without expecting a return? Make a cup of tea for a colleague, a morning greeting to a stranger, a thank you note, compliment another, a random act of kindness, or just your time.

Send out the Love. text a friend, loved one and tell them three things you love about them.

Exercise.  Do a quick 5 minute workout, dance or play with your pet…I’m sure you will feel better.

Be Present.Do Nothing.  The less you do, the better you’ll feel. Take one thing off your plate each day -say no, delegate or leave til tomorrow. Be present and just focus on each task in a mindful manner, just be.  

Go Outside. Take a walk in the garden or watch a sunrise. Sitting outside for five minutes a day is enough to feel good and change your mood.

Touch. Give and receive a kiss, a hug, a touch on an arm. Touch is transformational and healing.

Look for the Blessings. Look for what’s good in your life. Look for reasons to be grateful. Focus on the positive. You cannot be both happy and sad, so pick awesome 🙂

Stop. Look. Remember. Look through photos, savor your good memories, read your favorite quotes, and keepsakes.

Make a happy face. Smiling makes you happy even when you’re feeling sad. Smile at the people you love and even the ones you don’t. Smile just cause!

Listen to music. There’s not much a great song won’t cure. Dance it out, close your eyes, go with the flow…

Love. Dwell on love. Feel love. Send love to people in trouble or in pain. Send loving thoughts to your family and friends. Speak and act with love.

Uncording in 5 mins

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I believe we never fully disconnect from people who we have soul contracts with in this life; these arrangements are made long before your life  and those primary souls or key souls may play a part in the next life.  However we can release them! and this can help us move on. Of course the other person may take their own time.

Here is simple exercise.

There doesn’t have to be elaborate rituals or props for this.

Visualise the person in your mind who you have had problems with and say “We tried, we really tried, and it didn’t work”. Imagine tearing up the contract and throwing it away. Mentally say to them “I forgive you, I release you, I let you go. You go your way with love, we don’t have to be connected any more”.

Then its over… but remember to forgive them and forgive yourself.

Let go of fear and replace with love.

REPEAT as you need to.